Monday, 16 August 2010

Penitent Plonkers

It seems word gets around; so I had a phone call from one of the New Forest Plonkers a little embarrassed that someone discovered my blog, and so they found they'd had a bishop in their audience. I hope I reassured him; after all, I did spend two years in the Royal Air Force before ordination, so most of the words of the Plonkers' songs were well known to me already.

They did, though, offer a little penitential piece, which I think deserves a wider audience:


Almighty and most merciful Lord Bishop
We have erred and strayed from our ways like lost Plonkers
We have followed too much the devices and desires of our own audiences
We have offended against thine holy ears
We have left unsung those things that we ought to have sung
And we have sung those things that we ought not to have sung
Any apparent health in us we ascribe to a diet of Beta Blockers, Brufen and Beer
But thou, Lord Bishop, have mercy upon us miserable Plonkers
Spare though them who confess their lack of probity and talent
Revisit thou them who promise to try better
Come back next year to the New Forest Show
That we mays't give thee also something to bang and rattle
And that we may try even harder to remain
New Forest Plonkers

Well, I have dug out more photos from the New Forest Show to give you a taste of that very happy day. If you can get to one of their performances, do: it's all good clean fun.
I did not have my camera with me in Southampton last week, but the Road Traffic sign which caught my eye seemed to offer the perfect penance for the Plonkers, which I duly commended to them:
They meekly accepted the advice, and report that they were greatly diverted.


  1. "Shirley" is the nickname for the Bishop of Swansea and Brecon. To follow him is certainly a diversion from the Faith - see

  2. I have been told that Shirley is the nickname (name in religion?) of one of the Welsh bishops. If so, this explains a lot.